But with every good, comes a bad. In this case, I receive pressure from friends. Going out, having outings, meetups, it's part of my life. It used to be, and it is still, now. 

But.... Things are different now. And I'm not speaking about the boy involved. It's the job involved. Since I've started working, life has been getting increasingly tiring. Everyday, waking up at 6 or 7, go to work, and I don't end until 6pm. And the journey home isn't exactly the smoothest or fastest. It takes me 3hours minimum to and fro my workplace. 

People are gonna say, yah. But who doesn't need to work? & even if you are that busy, if you really sincerely want to meet me, you'll make the effort right? You just don't care! 

I think I'll feel so sad if I ever hear this from a selected few people. Because they don't understand or think from my point of view. I know, and I am, happy that people actually wants to meet me, cause it means they enjoy my company, isn't it? But sometimes when I don't make it to the outing, I have things planned already, you can't expect me to cancel it for you, right? My time is so much more precious now. I have to plan my schedule, in order not to waste any time at all. And what happens when you suddenly jump out and say this and that? My plans go gg. I have to rearrange, cancel, even. It's not the first time. That's what makes me frustrated. And what makes me even more frustrated is that every conclusion everyone comes to the moment I express doubt about the meeting, is that I'm meeting the boy. And I don't give a fuck about my friends anymore. Even if I am meeting him, what's wrong with that? My boyf is going into the army, just like everyone else. Is it wrong to want to spend more time with my love? I can't see him as often as I want anymore, too. 

I expected, you, as my friend, to have stepped in my shoes and thought abit about me. Of course, this does not mean that you guys are always second, I'll never meet you guys or maintain the relationship anymore. But at least, all I ask for is not to be angry about it? I apologize, but I am really trying my best. I drag my tired body to every meeting, then I go home and knock out almost immediately. 

I don't ask for sorry(s). I ask for understanding. I did not mean to piss anyone off, but I certainly do not think I deserved to be treated like a bitch that only cares about boyf. I love my boy. But I treasure my friendships too. Please understand.